Corporate Bullying: Why Adobe is Welcome to Bite Me.

I have recently decided to return to my roots as a dyed-in-the-wool anti-corporate guy. Here's one incident that helped push me in the right direction.

I downloaded the latest version of Adobe Reader. It installed a rogue application (rather like a virus, it's a program that you didn't invite that hides in the background and violates your rights) called "Adobe Updater." My firewall software didn't block it, since it thought it was a regular program.

I only noticed it a few days later when I tried to use some of my software. Recently, Adobe bought its only real competitior, Macromedia, in what was certainly one of the worst cases of anti-trust violation in the software world. Since they now owned the rights to this software, Adobe Updater decided to block my ability to use my legally-purchased Macromedia software until I re-registered with them.

Let's be clear: I own this software. I didn't steal it. This little rogue application that I did not agree to have on my computer changed my certification files so I couldn't use my software. It took a couple of days essentiall hacking my own operating system to delete these configuration files and replace them with the original ones. I also found out how to turn off this malicious program. There's not an option: you have to edit registration files and so forth.

So now I don't use any Adobe products. I found a little program called SumatraPDF, which so far has opened every .pdf file I have tried. And it's free.

I am replacing all my Adobe and Macromedia products with open source software wherever possible. If there isn't an open source version, I am buying software that doesn't have DRM.

I'm an honest person. Adobe's piracy problems are just that; their problems. It doesn't give them the right to violate the integrity of my privacy. They are creating their own piracy problems by bullying their customers.

Becoming an Open Source Human

In the past, this blog has been known for the adventures of a semi-fictional version of me who lives in Barstow and obsesses about the coming Hollywood-style post-apocalyptic scenario. I have moved all that to Apocalypse A-Go-Go, so I can focus this blog on more personal and sincere endeavors.



Firstly, I have started to dump my writing, under a Creative Commons License. I'm a big believer that our current copyright strategy doesn't serve artists and creators. Be warned, as a manic creative, I almost never write second drafts of anything.

Secondly, I will be writing about my own search for a functional and healthy way of life that doesn't make creating and surviving mutually exclusive.

I'm slowly becoming allergic to corporate practices and overbearing governmental restrictions. I want to participate in a world that encourages culture and creativity, and I find myself blocked at every turn by some piece of paper that I must fill out for the government, or some license agreement that I must sign or some copyright restriction that I might be violating that the corporations have police-like powers to bully me about.

I'm trying to switch to open source software, and to free my own work from restrictive rules. Cory Doctorow has been an inspiration to me on this front. Of course, I don't have his particular focus as an advantage: My own interests and creative drive are spread out over a wide range of subjects that basically span the whole human condition.

Lastly, I will be writing about my own experiences dealing with creative mania, and with how I have dealt with my inability (and unwillingness) to function in orthodox modern society.

The Plight of the Elusive Ground Elk

Most people have never even heard of the Ground Elk. A diminutive version of its much larger cousin (rather like the Key Deer)

 , this tiny burrow-dwelling creature is almost extinct due to the size of its antlers.

Now, this poor creature is facing another threat: Consumers.

Isn't it enough that they are endangered? Why do rich people insist on eating them? I saw this in a healthfood store yesterday:

Some days, I am ashamed to be an American.

Old Yeller, Part Deux

Yesterday I posted a blog entry about Old Yeller themed dogfood. To recap, this is dogfood themed around a Disney movie in which a young boy's beloved dog contracts rabies and the boy has to shoot it.

I have been fishing around on the internet to see if anyone else is outraged, and I discovered a lot of people back in the 2007 tainted petfood incident blamed this particular brand of dogfood on their dogs suddenly dying. Who knew?

"It's my dog, I'll do it."

I was shopping at the local supermarket last night at 3am. (My wife's out of town, so I rented an Xbox360 and I'm staying up all night.) When I walked down the petfood aisle, I noticed that they had Disney-themed petfood.

The catfood was themed around The Aristocrats, a cartoon about cats that we thankfully haven't been forced to watch since the 80's.

The dogfood... The dogfood was Old Yeller themed.



For those of you not familiar with this gem, Old Yeller was a live-action movie about a boy and his dog named "Old Yeller." At the end of the movie, Old Yeller contracts rabies, and the boy has to shoot his own dog. THE END.

Does anyone else see the inherent issue of poor taste?

I Need a Critical Mass

I've posted before that my needs aren't being met by my city. I have a short list of needs that shouldn't be hard to fulfill, but I just can't find them.

I have decided that what I need is a critical mass. I'm okay with living in a town that contains rednecks, trash, and other forcefully ignorant people. What I need is just enough of the other kind of people that it's not certain that everyone I talk to in a single day is going to suck.

I sit at my desk in my cubicle, and people call me with questions and complaints. My company sells diet pills, and I'm in customer service. I get calls from people who want to know if our pills will help them lose 15 pounds in the two weeks before they go to Baja. The honest answer is, no. The only thing that will help you lose that weight is if you put down the Doritos and go for a walk, and it will take at least as long to lose the weight as it took your fat ass to put it on.

I get people who call to return the pills because they have to take three of them a day, and they're so big. I do harder things before breakfast every day than take a few friggin' pills. If I managed to make it to adulthood and I couldn't manage to do something as simple as take three pills a day, I would be ashamed of myself.

I can't tell these people any of this, because I would lose my sucky job.



So, what I need is at least as many people in my life that are capable of thinking about the distant future and recognizing all the other people out there as also human.

I'm not sure I'll find that in Barstow.

My Two Cellphones

I have two cellphones: One old pay-per-minute cellphone, and a brand-spankin-new one with all the bells and whistles from a major wireless service. I don't want to mention their name here, so let's call them "Horizon."

My lovely, patient wife made me get a "real" cellphone right after she made me get a desk job. I still have the old phone hidden in my car.

My new cellphone costs me a base rate of $60 per month. It also offers pictures and email, but only if I fork out another $40 for internet access and then more to use it. It charges me extra if I drive 100 miles from home. I spend $115 per month on this service after all the little fees and taxes etc. that they add on.

My pay-per-minute cellphone offers me free text messaging and photos and email for $20 bucks per month. I spend about one hour per month on the phone, at 10 cents per minute wherever I am and wherever in the U.S. I'm calling. This works out to about $23 per month.

$115
- $23
= $92 dollars per month that I pay extra to have a "real" cellphone. Thanks, Horizon.

Real Coffeehouse Qualifications

I recently posted a rant about what makes a town livable. One of the main features was what I called a "real" coffeehouse.

I've been thinking about it a lot, and I have decided to offer a revised list of qualifications.

1)Must Sell Good Coffee

This should be a no-brainer, but so many coffeehouses sell weak, wet-ashtray-like coffee, and many others use the Starbucks model of overroasted coffee that tastes like they burnt down the village where it was grown (not completely out of the question.)

2) Must Offer a Welcome Atmosphere

I combined several of the others into this one. The coffeehouse must have comfortable chairs or sofas, it must not blare music so loud you get a headache, and it must offer free wireless access and electrical sockets for your laptop.
Basically, it must make you feel as though you are welcome to stay for a couple of hours and brood over your cup of coffee. If they didn't want you to hang out, they shouldn't have opened a coffee shop. Likewise if you do hang out all day, for goodness sakes, buy something every now and then and tip well.

3) Must Allow Tipping

That's right. Not only is it a barista's right to collect tips, it should be your right, your privilege -- nay, your pleasure to help out these bohemian heroes that keep your creative juices flowing.

4) Must Not Have an Agenda

This one is pointedly geared towards people with a political or religious agenda. I'm fine that you have your agenda, but I don't want to hear about your religion, and while I'm a feminist sympathizer of the first degree, I don't think you should stare angrily at me while I drink my espresso. (You know who you are.) I just came for coffee.

Just my thoughts.

All I Want is a Real Friggin' Coffeehouse

I really only have a short list of needs from a town to make it livable. Here's my list:

1. Must be pedestrian friendly
2. Must have a good library
3. Must have good parks
4. Must have a collection of interesting creative people
5. Must have real coffeehouses

The town I'm living in right now doesn't have a single real coffeehouse.
Let me tell you what I mean by a "real" coffeehouse. A real coffeehouse sells good coffee, has free wireless internet access and electrical sockets, doesn't blast loud music while you're trying to relax, and is open early to late.

The town I'm in has a Starbucks. They don't sell coffee. They do sell some kind of dark strong drink similar to coffee. I'm not sure, but it may be made from burnt rubber.

The town I'm in has several "Christian coffeehouses." I have no problem with Christians, but they need to stay out of the coffee business. They charge people for silly little things like whipped cream, etc., and you have to beg for the password to use their internet.

There used to be one real coffeehouse in town. It's still there, but the owner got tired of fighting the city government and now opens at noon. It turns into a bar at 6pm. That gives me a 6 hour window to get my work done. They also blast music so loud I can't hear myself scream at them to turn it down.

I have taken to driving 70 miles to the nearest real town. What has this country come to?